Cuts and Bruises Here I Come

Right, where did I leave off last week oh that’s right shiny new bike and helmet, training here I come! Well the bike sat in the garage till Greek Adonis noticed the helmet.

Greek Adonis “Hey Mom, did you get a bike?”

Me”I sure did”

Greek Adonis “wow that’s a cool bike, cut and bruises here I come, I know what to get you for Christmas - Neosporin and Band-Aids.”

Me “Cheeky wee shite”

And so the bike sat quietly in the garage. I’m still not quite sure how to go about this training stuff. I don’t really have a plan so I go into school on Friday and we have PE. I have to get my kit on like the kids, I’m not quite sure why because we just stand about looking… Well, let’s just say looking the part.

But today I think this could be my chance to start training - you know work out with 6 year olds - I’d say that was about my level of fitness, you’d think right? Well not so much. I tell one of the little girls that I’ll be on her relay team because they are one person short and she huffs and rolls her eyes and says “oh no!” Seriously I think, am I that bad? Well apparently yes. Ok I’ll have to rethink this I think a visit to the doctor to make sure that I should take on this challenge!

But first a wee after school glass of wine with the girlies. I see a pattern here. A few glasses of wine later.

Lesley “oooh can I come see your new bike?”

Me “yes sure”

She goes out to the garage and she’s all oh that’s so cool and can I try it on! And then proceeds to get on the shiny new stationary bike and immediately falls off! She’s worse at this than me but to be fair I haven’t actually got on the shiny new bike except with the help of two men and a bike stand.

Shiny new bike 1 shite bike riders 0

Saturday afternoon and so the training begins…..

I muster up the energy and the guts to go out on the bike but I’ve already told Smug Git that I’m only going round the school parking lot (five laps is one mile) and that I need to practice starting and stopping because while I can actually pedal it’s just the starting and stopping I have the problems with. Three miles later and lots of practice and I think I’ve got it down. I don’t want to push my luck so I come home and if you remember right at the start of this ridiculous adventure he promised me a beer after each training ride so I sit on the sofa and have a beer. Happy to report, although it was a Saturday night, I only had one other beer but did have to go to bed at 10:30pm. Wow! 3 miles takes it out of you, maybe it was all the stopping and starting.

I waken up on Sunday morning and I’m raring to go Smug Git is shocked but I get my kit on and it’s back on the bike, round the parking lot for a mile and then wait for it….out on the roads! I know can you believe it? Look what happens when you don’t drink beer and have an early night, I feel like I can do anything. Five miles later we head back to the parking lot because I need to practice trying to take my white knuckled hands of the handle bars since I can’t feel my fingers. I get to the parking lot one happy bike rider. I’m minding my own business trying to get some feeling back in my hands when from the corner of my eye I see a little girl on her bike…Shiny bike with a basket and streamers and she’s headed my way to the parking lot! Are you kidding me? She starts chasing me round the parking lot, obviously beating me, zig zaging in and out of me all giggling and laughing and I swear to god I’ll take her out! Does she not know I’m exhausted, I’ve been riding for miles! What is it with these six year old girls I think their just jealous and got it in for me. Mean girls!

Back home Smug Git is in the kitchen.

Smug Git “So you happy?”

Me “yes! Oh my god I can hear you smiling. Stop smiling and get me a beer!”

Serious bit…..

Firstly here is my link http://main.nationalmssociety.org/goto/izzi

What is the BP MS 150?

The BP MS 150 is a two-day fundraising cycling ride organized by the National MS Society: Lone Star. This ride is the largest event of its kind in North America. In 2011, the event raised more than $16 million for MS.The ride is a 180-mile journey for MS from Houston to Austin. Breakpoints are positioned every 8-15 miles. The ride begins Saturday morning at three convenient starting points: Tully Stadium in Houston, Rhodes Stadium in Katy and Waller Stadium in Waller. Riders follow scenic roads into Bellville for lunch. Day One ends at the Fayette County Fairgrounds overnight in La Grange.

On Sunday morning Club 300 members lead the mass on one of two routes that lead to Bastrop Intermediate School for lunch from the fairgrounds. Take the Bechtel Challenge Route and enjoy the rolling terrain of Bastrop and Buescher State Parks or bypass the parks via the Pfizer Lunch Express Route. The final leg of Day Two takes riders into Austin for exciting Finish Line festivities at the capital.


Thanks for reading see y’all next week!


Next week my doctors visit and trip to the finish line.